Running On Empty...

Does it ever fail that when you're in desperate need of a cup of coffee, that the cup you are finally served in, is like the size of a thimble? Or if there is enough to fill up the cup, that the coffee is 17 days old and counting? (What's that floating in that cup anyway?!) I admit, there are days that I feel like I'm part of the "Land of the Dead", scouring the countryside in search of anything that resembles coffee. You know what I mean, you've been there. It's just the caffeine, nothing else, anything will do. A couple of nights ago was one of those nights. I came back up to the shop, to help Andy Guy close up for the night, (yes, his name REALLY is Andy Guy, and...yes, he IS a guy!), and the first thing I headed to was the air-pot on the counter, hopefully, full of coffee, and hopefully, fresh. (What was I really thinking? It was time to close up shop and if there was any coffee at all, it needed to be poured out.) It wasn't. Full anyway. Far from fresh. Just enough to briefly satisfy my urgent sense of need. Isn't it crazy that we give in to the weakest of wants! I understand that after I had went home a few hours earlier, that I had drank enough sweet tea to float a large ship, but there was something else that I need to fulfill that overwhelming craving. Andy was quick to remind me that, this was unusual behavior in me. (Little does he know what unusual in ME looks like!) "I'm supposed to want quality instead of quantity" he said with that silly grin on his face. However, I had a brilliant reply for his comments, "shut up Andy, I just gotta have coffee!" So after I licked my cup clean in an effort to savor every drop, I could think somewhat rational, and helped Andy close down the store. What I wouldn't admit was that if I had only waited just a few minutes...waited...just a few...minutes..I could have had a serious 4-shot latte. Now that's what I'm talking about! But no...I settled for less than the best.

I wonder sometimes if this is the type of craving...thirst...that the writer ment when he wrote Psalm 42? 'As the deer pants for the water brooks. So pants my soul for You, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.' Man, can you imagine! Don't you wish you knew what he was going through in life? Really makes me wonder! Who knows...maybe he had just lost his job...maybe he was so far behind in paying his bills that bankrupcy seemed to be the only way out...maybe everything he seemed to try, failed...maybe his marriage was crashing...who knows! The bottom line is that this man was WAAAAYYY in over his head...his world was crashing in...and he knew only one thing...a cool, fresh, soul-quencing taste of Holy God! And he knew it was worth the wait.

I've been in way over my head before...close to that right now. It's hard sometimes to really determine what's up or down in this crazy, confused world we live in. There are times that I have just wanted to jump in a hole and pull a rock in over me. Trying to solve problems on my own...knowing that if I had only waited...there's that word again, waited...if I had only waited that God works all things out according to His Will, in His time. The psalmist got his answer...rather quickly. Just a few verses later, in Psalm 46 verses 10 & 11, God tells him to 'Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth! The Lord of hosts is with us; The God of Jacob is our refuge.' "Be still" (sound alot like 'wait' to me) and know that I am God. Powerful words of hope to a desperate man...those same powerful words also speak to a desperate world today...powerful words of hope that speaks to me...and you.

"Father, help me to always be desperate...thirsty...thirsty for You, and never settling for day old coffee, hoping that it will quench my craving. Help me to never settle for less than the best...anything less than You will never, never satisfy my needs. There are lots of things in this world that attempt to resemble You...glimpes of You...but NEVER You. Help me to 'be still' and wait..wait on YOU...knowing all things are possible through You. Help me to stay vertical...amen"

The waiting will soon be over...the timer on the coffee brewer is going off...and it's a good thing...my cup is empty.